Why do I cry so easily?

Crying is a great way to release emotional stress. However, crying quite often can be a bit uncomfortable and sometimes even embarrassing while in public. You need to know that crying during movies while reading a sad book or during overwhelming situations is completely normal. People around us often forget that crying is just another way of handling our emotions. While some people are more emotional and cry often than others, others cry only during funerals or rarely at all. Despite your emotions being all over the place, you must not forget that being vulnerable does not mean being weak. There could be driving forces like anger, sadness, pain, or stress behind your tears but if you feel uncomfortable for too long, try consulting a therapist or a professional.

How can I stop crying?

Calming yourself during stressful situations is hard but not impossible. Know that if we master controlling our emotions, we can lead a healthy and happy life. It could take years for you to build control over your mind and heart but gradually you will realize that it is possible. Talking is therapy, and when talking does not work, try writing. We underestimate the power of writing our hearts out. If you are someone who does not like sharing what you are going through, penning it down can work. You should write whatever you are going through and just in case you want to release anger or stress towards any particular person, you can write a letter under their name and later on tear it into pieces and toss it into the bin. This is trick writers often do to release their emotional stress.

Why can’t I stop crying?

• There is an unresolved conflict happening inside your head because of which you are not at peace.
• You are overthinking about things that do not matter in the present.
• You are constantly assuming what other people are thinking about you.
• You are angry or sad with your family, partner, or friends.
• You keep on remembering that one incident that hurt you a long time ago.
• You are comparing your personal life, income, or health with other people.
• You are scrolling through social media unnecessarily.
• You are alone and in need of a friend to share your emotions with.
• You are fighting depression, anxiety, or other underlying problems. (Please consult a doctor before making any conclusions)

Is it wrong for men to cry?

Our society has associated crying as a sign of emotional weakness and it has pinned it as something only women do which has made it severely hard for men to cry even inside their own homes. But a part of Generation Z and Millennials does not consider vulnerability as a sign of weakness which is why we are heading towards a good future where crying would not be gender-stereotyped. Crying only makes us human and it should not be restricted to any particular gender. So yes, men do cry and men must cry whenever they feel like crying. Hiding your emotions can lead to physical and mental stress.

Why does crying make me feel better?

We release endorphins when we cry. Oxytocin and endogenous opioids are feel-good chemicals that help you in easing emotional and physical pain. You release the tension and emotions that you have been holding back which helps you in feeling relieved. Crying also helps you to improve your mood and recover from grief or trauma which is why you feel less heavy and numb after crying. It may sound weird but crying once in a while is good for your mental health. If you have been piling up your thoughts and struggling to fight with your emotions then crying could be a great way to relax your body and mind.

When should I ask for help?

When you feel like you can not handle the pain or stress, you must ask for help. Seeking help is normal especially when you feel surrounded by darkness and melancholy. Don’t shy away from seeking help from a mental health professional if you feel hopeless and lost quite often. If you feel like crying every day or too often at regular intervals then it could be signs of depression.

Symptoms of depression may include:

• feeling sad, hopeless, or helpless
• not finding interest in things that you once loved
• crying over small things or having trouble finding reasons behind your tears
• unexplained aches or pains on different parts of body
• thoughts of death or suicide
• loss of appetite
• sudden weight gain, or weight loss
• oversleeping or having trouble sleeping
• feeling tired all the time
• losing will to complete even smallest of tasks

What does it mean if you cry easily?

Crying easily could mean that you are more emotional or empathetic than other people. If you cry after seeing emotional videos or watching sad movies, then perhaps you are an emotional person but being emotional is not bad. People associate showing emotions as a sign of weakness but it is just human to showcase our emotions from time to time. Our emotions can overwhelm us and we must learn gradually how to build control over our emotions. If you cry easily, it is not necessarily because there is something wrong with you, it could be just that you are an emotional or a sensitive person.

Does crying make me weak?

Crying does not make you weak. In fact, we all should cry every now and then to release stress and tension. You can feel light and less anxious after crying. You must remember that there are things which are not in our control and there are things which may turn our different than what we have planned. In those situations, try not to overthink and don’t believe as if the universe is conspiring against you because it is not. We all have stressful days and we all feel hopeless from time to time but you must learn that darkness is temporary. If you feel otherwise, try talking advice or help from a doctor or mental health expert who have the necessary knowledge on the subject. Don’t make conclusions yourself and don’t believe everything you read online.

5 ways to stop crying so easily

• Drink water and take long deep breaths.
• Reach out to a friend or a family member for help with whom you feel heard and safe.
• Hug yourself and remind yourself of all the wars you have overcome in the past.
• Go out for a walk, or do something that you love doing.
• Take the help of a mental health professional who can comfort you.

What to remember?

Whenever you feel hopeless, try to think of all people who have overcome various storms in life just like you. Try to remember all the storms you have overcome in the past. It will give you hope to fight various battles of life. Life isn’t easy but you are definitely strong enough to fight life no matter how hard it is. There are times when our emotions are overwhelming and uncontrollable but when that brief moment of pain has passed, you will feel neutral again or even happy. If you feel alone, try adopting a pet. Animals could be our best friends when humans fail to understand how we feel. Despite all the tears and all the pain, remember that life is beautiful after all.

Definitions of love

It took me years to realise that love is a road where you may go willingly or unwillingly but you won’t wish to leave until you’re fully exhausted, almost ripped up from head to toe.

At 12, my eyes chased love like a wanderer at that busy street waiting for a hand to come and brush gently against my arms. Someone whose touch would feel like home, someone who won’t walk out of the door just after a fight, someone who won’t leave me alone on that street during the darkest nights. I always say I kept chasing love like a fool, maybe because we’re all fools in love to believe that it’s meant to be chased. We’re fools to believe that it won’t come to us if we sit alone with a heart full of unwanted hope ignoring the fact that even if young cupid’s blind, he’ll find us when it’s the right time.

At 14, I thought chasing people would make them fall for me eventually but it’s not a game you see, you can’t keep rolling the dice until it shows the desired number. You can’t keep holding onto an unrealistic expectation, a happily ever after with someone who barely acknowledges what you feel. You can’t… keep suffering.

At 17, I thought love was supposed to be a home whose walls are decorated with different parts of two souls brought together by destiny until I met a stranger who proved all those definitions wrong.

At 19, I think love is supposed to be a garden full of roses and thorns. Some days you’ll feel it’s presence like a freshly plucked flower from the garden and on the others, you may bleed and get scratched but that won’t make any difference to what you feel inside those fences.
—𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘶𝘭 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘢𝘮

Empty spaces

I look at you
with all the love
in the world,
you look at me
as if I am
just another lover.

I don’t like empty spaces,
empty rooms or even boxes
for they scare me the most.

They seem scary and saddening, but most importantly they break my heart. It’s just so tragic to even look at them. It feels like they are nothing, no value, they just don’t matter even if their outside is shiny, decorated and too catchy that it fills your heart with curiosity to know what’s on the inside; when you finally do, it’s nothing. I was trying to tell you how I feel lately. I’m trying to explain how my heart feels when I’m with him. He lays his head on my lap too often, with thoughts of girl that he has been with before, asks for my hands tenderly but whispers her name when it comes to more. My chest is a graveyard you see, with thousands of expectations and promises buried like seeds, though I know they won’t bloom again like flowers of hope near a tombstone. Nevermind, so I was telling you about my love, he looks at me like I’m nothing. They say love is in your lover’s eyes, but what if I see nothing? Can their still be love hiding behind those curtains? It’s just… sad.

When you feel all the love in the world that it feels impossible to take it out from your chest. It’s like a drowning boat, no matter how much water you take out, it keeps occupying the unwanted spaces, it keeps on getting heavier, and there comes a time when you finally drown in your own sea of sadness. You suffocate your peace with your own hands for something that wasn’t anything. And when that love occupies every corner of your chest, you’re willing to drown, give up and sometimes… die.
—𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘶𝘭 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘢𝘮

When I couldn’t see…

The irony is,

the world seems colourless
to those who have eyes

and colourful to those
who are blind.

A month ago if someone would’ve said to me that I won’t be able to see clearly in the next ten days, I would’ve punched them in the face. A week ago if someone would’ve said to me that I won’t be able to see clearly ever again, I would’ve believed them without even thinking.

I wrote those lines around 11:30 p.m. after swallowing a sleeping pill, it was necessary to pen it down because my mind was restless. Until a few days ago, I had to keep my eyes closed most of the time because I was intolerant towards bright light and that was when I realised what I was missing.

I had everything around me, beauty in its simplest forms that I always chose not to see. And with my eyes closed, I kept wondering how the world around me was still as beautiful as ever, it was my heart that stopped noticing and acknowledging the little things. Be it the way my smile forms when I look into the mirror or the way my mother giggles when she’s happy. I couldn’t see anything even when I had my eyes wide open. I realised it all when I had them closed. I realised it all when I couldn’t open them… anymore.
—𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘶𝘭 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘢𝘮

Where it hurts the most

He hits me
where it hurts the most
and pierces a needle
right through the softest
corner of my heart
and then leaves me laying down
suffering and questioning
until I put a stone on my chest
and pray not to fall apart.

He tell me I’m precious
and makes me believe
how his world revolves
around the corners of my eyes
and then the same night
he feasts on her soul
and reminds me
how I am wanted
not needed, like
just. another. choice.

I sit here still
praying to the winds,
staring at the moon,
blowing kisses
out of my window
and scraping the dirt
collected on the sill,
in the hope
that they’ll touch him again
even if my hands can’t
while I’m longing
from miles away.

Tell me, how do I tell him
it hurts to watch him
come and go
like waves of the ocean
while I feel like
just another shore
yearning for him
to take me away
because a part of me
is always begging
and craving
for him to stay.

–parul nigam

Love and Pain

The more broken is your heart,
the higher are the walls to protect it,
and the lesser are the chances
for the right love to climb in.

But, heartbreak is like a scar you see,
it happens once
but you carry it forever
in between the lines on your palms,
and every time after that
when love tries
to come close to you,
you stare at those lines
and it reminds you of nothing
but unbearable pain
and irreparable hurt,
a cursed fate and innumerable efforts
thrown away in the dirt.

One. Two. Three. Four.
How many can you go through
until you realise
love isn’t everything sweet and gentle,
with soft music playing
in the background
and promises of happily ever after
spilling from your lover’s mouth?
How many heartbreaks
until you realise
it’s like carrying an anchor
inside your chest?

Well, sorry to break it down for you
but love IS pain.
It is like keeping your heart
on the bed of nails.
It Is like pushing yourself
off the edge without even thinking.
It is breaking, weeping
and days of suffering.

There’s no perfect fairytale.

It took me years to believe in this,
but at least now I’m not blind,
for I understand the power
of the waves which will hit me
if just in case I take a dive,

love is an ocean you see,
some days the waves are calm
but on the others,
they hit you hard,
so hard that you drown.

–parul nigam